January & February 2011 Match Reports

Sunday 6th February 2011

League, Edward Alleyn Club

Real Madras 2 - 3 Banter Central FC
  Baird (pen), Brownie, Wommy

Team: Tyler; Boma, Tino, Dancer (Bennett, 75); Cling, Gillardino, Doc, Wilkes, Baird (Wommy, 65); Hughes, Brownie

The right result in an up and down performance for Banter. It keeps the promotion hopes alive and means the home clash with Santos this coming Sunday is ever more important. “You’ve got a lot of games remaining,” remarked Madras’ forward following the final whistle. “You could still win this thing”, he added. It might require a helping hand elsewhere to see off Barracuda, but there’s certainly some truth in the statement.

The whole thing was under threat early on though; as Real Madras began the game sharper and seeing some early efforts fly wide from corner kicks. The normally excellent Edward Alleyn surface was dry and like most grounds at the moment has suffered from the recent cold snap, leaving a lot of high bouncing balls which were not helped by the strong winds when they were in the air. It meant it was a bit of a scrappy affair, with neither team finding a particularly good rhythm early on.

But the frustrated fans – in their hundreds thanks to the passing trains overlooking the pitch – saw the first goal come midway through the half when a long ball forward was misjudged by Tino, allowing the home side’s number nine to race through and slot the ball away to open the scoring.

Banter came close to equalising when a lovely move in midfield saw Brownie released by Hughes, but Banter’s top scorer fired narrowly wide. It was the away side's first really decent chance and good two touch play.

The game was evens shortly after though, as Baird reacted quickly to take a throw-in for Wilkes in the box, the Elmander look-alike spun his marker and was tripped to win his side a penalty. Kid Baird stepped up and slotted it away with assurance.

Madras went closest after this, one set piece from deep was floated in and not dealt with by Banter, drifting narrowly wide. The scores were 1-1 at the half.

For the first 20 minutes of the second half, Banter could be forgiven for questioning whether this was: “one of those days”, or even how the hell every 50-50 decision was going against them. Whilst the referee was certainly not showing bias, he made some puzzling choices, the worst of which was to wave play on when Hughes rounded the goalkeeper and was quite blatantly tripped; in trying to stay up, he was tackled whilst stumbling for the final finish. Though a dreadful decision, is it any wonder a certain 21 year-old hits the deck with the slightest contact? A foul is a foul and even the Madras players had seen the let-off.

Brownie had a terrific chance to give his side the lead, racing through on goal with the goalkeeper to beat, he leathered his shot past the helpless keeper but saw his effort bounce down off the underside of the bar and out. Banter’s morning didn’t get any easier when Baird had to go off injured, he was replaced by Wommy.

But for Banter’s goalkeeper, it really might have been a different result. Still at 1-1, Madras’ forward had a header from a cross down the right, which he managed to loop over defender and Tyler, but the Banter keeper back-pedalled and leapt to tip the ball onto the post with a quite outrageous save. Reacting quickest, he pounced on the rebound as everyone in white breathed a sigh of relief.

The save was a moment that looked to turn the game. Giving Banter some confidence and belief, the all important second goal soon followed. Cling took a short corner to Hughes, who weaved his way past his marker and fired in a cross for Brownie to strike into the bottom corner. His strike partner, Wommy, had a good chance to extend his side’s lead when he raced through one on one, but his shot was straight at the goalkeeper. Fortunately, the substitute made amends shortly after, receiving the ball deep he had Hughes cut out to the wing, Cling pull inside and Brownie divert his run down the left, leaving Wommy the easiest of opportunities to run straight through the middle, which he did so unchallenged and finished into the bottom corner. 3-1 and game over? Not quite.

Bennett came on to replace Legend Dancer, who was struggling with a groin problem. The big, blonde, David Moyes-alike took his place back atop the throne of Banter’s oldest ever player, proud as ever. But Madras replied quickly, though from the corner it was not quite all hands on deck as it was all hands on Doc, a Madras leap above his shoulders caused a diversion as his team-mate headed in to pull a goal back. It was a cheap goal, but Banter held out, despite a weak penalty claim and chance near the end which was seen off. It was an important win and one which could potentially go a long way later on.

Man of the match: Phil Tyler. Along with the memorable save at 1-1, Banter’s ‘keeper was assured, confident, quick off his line throughout and made several good catches from long balls. Weirdly, he was singled out a few times as some sort of weak link by the opposition. Which, given it started early and he’d barely touched the ball, I can only assume that’s because of his size and this might be just one of those things he’ll have to laughably put up with. Stereotypes are wide of the mark all too often, though. It’d be like assuming Madras’ centre-forward was really quick because, well… You know why. Except that he isn't. Fortunately, where Tyler isn’t 6ft 3 and immediately a presence, he makes up for it with speed, agility, unbelievable reactions and on Sunday’s showing, good organisational skills too. Shoot on sight? Go on, we dare you.

And finally...Not a vintage performance and perhaps a little fortunate that Madras lacked cutting edge going forward towards the end, but a win was all that was needed. Particularly when at one point it seemed an impossibility and a draw or loss inevitable once things start going against us. We did well to pull through and at times of adversity, in this game and away to Carlton when they pulled a goal back and began believing, as well
  as being 0-2 down to Kurdish, we've stuck at it and dug deep. We can't ask for more than that.The Barracuda result was a set back, but one game at a time we can still have a successful league campaign. Santos (h) first, then in no order: Woodmansterne (h), Selsdon (h), Kurdish (a) and Surrey Valley (a). Not to mention the Leonard Vase and round three of the League Cup to come. Having played so well so far this year, we’re entering an important time in good form. Last year’s league collapse came around this time, too. Having toasted Carlton at home, we lost to Maple Tree and then, on Boma’s birthday weekend, took a drubbing from Carlton at their place. Despite the run we went on after this (eight unbeaten), it became very difficult to claw it back. Do you want beans and bacon with that? This moment nearly gave me a fattie. “I bet you loved that”, remarked Hughes. Too fucking right I did.

Sunday 30th January 2011
League, Purley Way

Barracuda 1 - 0 Banter Central FC

Team: Doc; Boma, Tino, Gillardino; Ridley (Cling, 70), Fintan, Wilkes, Hughes, Baird; Brownie, Wommy (Euro, 25)

There are some strange things that many will struggle to answer in the Municipal this season. Such questions may include: how are Addiscombe top of division four with only one loss? How did that Carlton side win division two last year? What has happened to Maple Tree? Why are the almost unrecognisable Kurdish called such a name and then allowed to join the league in, effectively, January? And how in 180 minutes of football have Barracuda managed to get an aggregate scoreline of 5-1 over Banter Central?

As with all amateur football, many things are unexplainable. But Barracuda’s 1-0 victory over Banter Central deserves at least some praise for the home side. A slice of luck, or a dogged amount of determination; whichever you decide is more fitting, the result was an important one.

From a Banter Central point of view, it was ever more frustrating when coupled with the team performance – for the away side could genuinely come away knowing that it was certainly not a bad one. In fact, it would be difficult to pick out any individual and say he had a poor game.

Euro’s injury following his introduction for another injured player - Wommy - might well have summed up the hard luck on the day, but Banter created by far the more chances and played by far the better football, controlling the play in all areas and reducing the home side to only a couple of shots on target, much to the frustration of Doc’s chilly bones in the Banter goal.

But before Wommy’s exit, he’d taken only a few short minutes to burst onto a through ball and lob the oncoming goalkeeper, landing a perfectly weighted shot up and over, the ball bounced once and over the crossbar. In any other January this century, let alone another ground in the league, this would have landed in the net. But Purley Way’s pitch was surprisingly firm and the downhill slope didn’t help it’s flight as everyone looked on in disbelief at its trajectory.

Moments later, a mistake at the back by a Barracuda defender saw Baird capitalise but rush his shot from the edge of the area and could only force a save from the goalkeeper. Hughes also had two good chances, the first was another mistake at the back which he latched onto but fired his shot wide of the far post; the second was a clear cut chance from a Baird cut back, which he struck first time in the area and saw his shot parried.

Against the run of play, Barracuda’s number nine collected the ball in the Banter half during a rare attack by his side and with enough time to look up, he fired a shot towards goal but within a split second of the ball leaving his foot, it took a wicked deflection from Boma on the edge of the area and ended up in the top corner with Doc stranded.

Following a brave challenge with the Barracuda ‘keeper, Wommy managed to hurt his shoulder in the collision and though he attempted to continue, creating one and hitting another half chance which was blocked whilst struggling on, he was soon substituted for the returning Euro. Banter’s number ten looked lively with pace and trickery in his first appearance since February 2010, but following a foot race with an opponent he soon managed to strain his hamstring which would leave him capable, but not at 100% for the remainder of the game.

The second half saw Banter hold more of the possession, but create fewer chances than in the first half. From corners, the away side had several good headers in the penalty area, but couldn’t find the net. Euro had an early effort when running towards goal, which he fired just over the crossbar, much to the annoyance of Brownie who reacted by spitting his dummy out.

Baird continued to open up the Barracuda defence down the left hand side, but the final ball was just lacking. Frustration was beginning to show all round, with Banter having no joy in front of goal and the home side pegged back for long spells which saw them kick out on numerous occasions and threaten to break people’s legs too. Being completely fair, this was a very small minority and quite obviously hollow threats from chavs who spend their social lives bottling refereeing decisions at Power League.

In amongst the poor challenges, Barracuda’s left winger was rightly booked but Boma was wrongly let off the hook following a dreadful challenge deep inside his own half which brought down Barracuda’s best player. It was dreadful only in the fair play league, which whilst important of course, it should be pointed out that he had just bailed out his teammates by making it. The referee opted not to caution Banter’s number six, which was just one of many decisions he called incorrectly for either side. His ability to judge offsides was almost as staggering as Barracuda’s linesman’s audacity to flag everytime the ball moved forward. Sometimes even when it didn't.

Cling replaced Ridders for the last 20 minutes of the match as Banter continued to press high up the pitch. Hughes and Baird worked a short corner which left the former in a good position to shoot, which he did so with a powerful effort which flashed across goal for Euro and Brownie to both half-heartedly go for with a header but miss, as the ball trickled agonisingly wide.

The best chance of the half fell to Cling right at the death, when Baird beat two players down the wing and cut back perfectly for Cling, who with the goalkeeper out of the picture, controlled and struck the ball past a defender towards goal in a busy penalty area, only for another defender to stick out a leg a couple of yards off the line. The ball was cleared to safety as Banter’s day was done.

Man of the match: David ‘Icon Kid’ Baird. Either the right sided players in the CMSFL are all terrible, or Kid Baird has managed to both contain and attack them with equally devastating measure that makes him unplayable. You decide.

Some comments...We’ve played in narrow losses and games where we’ve failed to find the net for Banter before and we can at least say that on this occasion we deserved more for our efforts. We played well throughout and I’d be worried if we didn’t create the chances at all. Two penalties and a deflection have effectively seen us crippled by this lot though, which is hard to take.We’re still in with a good shout to be promoted. We lost a bit of ground on Sunday, but with six league games still to play we can hardly consider anything else. But time is running out. Firstly, we can still catch Santos without relying on anyone else. With Barracuda, we’ll need a bit more luck – but five wins out of ten from them suggest they’ll drop more points. Their attitude at the end on Sunday seemed to suggest that they’ll just need us to do them a favour against Santos to wrap it all up for them, but us and Selsdon could spring a surprise yet. Sunday's game was important and it
  would've put us in such a strong position if we'd won, but it wasn't make or break.In the last four games, we’ve conceded five goals. It’s not quite the clean sheets we’re after, but it’s a marked improvement and defensively – both the actual defence line and from the front, as well as in midfield – we’ve looked more stable and on Sunday kept our opponents very quiet indeed. Eggs wasn’t even necessary. At any point. That’s how dominant we were.There’s only one way to bounce back from a disappointing loss. No, not tuck yourself away for a ‘sneaky one’. I mean us, as a football team. Sunday’s game away to Madras will be a challenge as always, they’ve just moved ahead of us in the table as well – albeit with a few more games played – having beaten and drawn with Santos and Barracuda respectively in January.