October 2009 Match Reports

Sunday 25th October 2009

League, John Ruskin Playing Fields

Portland 4 - 0 Banter Central FC

Team: Wuker; Doc (Bushy, 80), Vidic, Tino, L.Dancer (Wommy, 55); Ridders, Hughes, Wilkes (J-Dot, 70), Cling; Baird, Brownie

Another Banter-Portland fixture, another Portland win. Three in a row. There were huge similarities in the previous two fixtures, the home side harassed and fought hard throughout whilst Banter never found any rhythm and did not seem up to the task of battling to win.

Many things can be said of the pitch. Warning from Portland’s other team came when one individual joked we were playing over on the top pitch and the “best we have”, in a rather sarcastic voice. It’s best described as a sloped kids pitch. Small in size, dramatic in incline, not just from side to side but down into one corner, too. A minor point no doubt - particularly given the display from the blues - but noteworthy nevertheless, even if the home team knew how to play it far better.

Largely though, the game had very few exciting moments at all. The referee was faultless, he communicated well and didn’t fuss over any challenges, allowing advantages where necessary and stopped play when it needed to be.

Wuker was on hand to keep Banter in the game in the first half, he made a good save with an outstretched leg when Portland’s winger had danced through the team and got through one on one. The same individual made no mistake soon after though, a similar run from right to left saw him smash a shot just inside the area into the bottom right corner to make it 1-0. Fully deserved from the home side.

Banter’s most dangerous moments came from set pieces. A few corners were swung in from Ridders and Cling but were not met with any conviction, whilst Hughes went close with a free kick from the edge of the area, the goalkeeper saving well.

By half time it was all to play for; Banter discussed the issues as a team and identified what needed to be done to get back into the game. The second half was far more promising for the blues, though the score line might suggest otherwise. Banter attacked quickly and with more purpose in the early goings, but did not trouble Portland’s goalkeeper enough. This was the most disappointing part of the day, that it’s the first time this term, including pre-season, that the ball hasn’t been put in the back of the net by Banter. It isn’t expected to be a problem, but it could become one if complacency kicks in.

With barely 10 minutes gone of the second half, Portland’s ability to use the pitch they knew well became very apparent. Now shooting “down hill”, Portland’s skipper picked up a throw-in a full 40 yards from goal and made Rory Delap look like Rory Bremner. Or Julian Clary. Or someone who can’t throw. In short, his throw-ins were monstrous, having the ability to throw the thing fully into the opposing goal mouth needing only a slight touch to take it in. They were dangerous, he took one as a warning and the second did take that slight touch to make it 2-0 to Portland. Unfortunately that touch appeared to come from Vidic, having been the only one to go and challenge the forward from just a few yards from Banter’s goal line as everyone stood and watched it glance in at the back post. It was Esher Athletic all over again.

Wommy was introduced immediately; he replaced Legend Dancer, moving Cling to left-back and Baird to left-midfield. Banter continued to push forward and made a few decent exchanges in passes, but didn’t get the ball into the forwards with anywhere near enough regularity, didn’t trouble either centre-back and whilst Portland’s goalkeeper had a good game when called upon, he just wasn’t called upon the way in which is expected.

The best chance for the away side came when a speculative effort from Brownie was spilled by the goalkeeper, Ridders darted in for the rebound to have his shot saved, Wommy pounced on that and saw a bundle of bodies dive in for the cause to get the ball clear. J-Dot was introduced for Wilkes in midfield, but the game was beginning to slip slowly away as space opened up when Banter reverted to a 3-4-3 formation.

Portland’s third was largely unstoppable, the tricky winger moved into space from the right and peppered a shot from 25 yards into the far corner which crashed in off the post to make the scores 3-0. Wuker could do nothing about it, though his hat throwing, side flick of the leg outside of his area and Superman punch when a catch would’ve done brought worrying moments. Or comedy moments for the watching support, perhaps. It was all in keeping with a team effort and Portland got a late forth when they broke on the counter attack; hit a cross from the right for the centre-forward to head back across goal as it slowly crept in past the wrong footed goalkeeper.

Bushy replaced Doc with about 10 minutes remaining, he even went close with a header from a Ridders free kick, which he stooped at and nodded just over the crossbar. 4-0 was the final score line.

Man of the match: Andrew ‘Tino’ Sheridan. He didn’t back down or admit defeat easily and had a tremendous second half, commanding and seeing a lot of the ball, too. He didn’t do a lot differently to normal, but that was because his standards were never allowed to drop.

You can pick holes in what’s gone on in 5 games and look at it that none of the wins have actually been that impressive if you wish. On the flip side you can say we’ve just been very poor in our two losses. You get out of it what you put in, that’s what is accurate. The three wins were very good, it was a great way to start our season. But they stand alone and were very different in their own ways as well. The Leonard Vase Cup match was a very difficult encounter, one which we could’ve taken something from and it resulted in a narrow loss to a decent side. Again, that game should be taken and analysed on its own, just like this match. On this occasion we were out thought, out battled and out classed. Portland remained organised, patient and took advantage of, at times, our lackluster play. We stood and watched far too much. We watched as our teammates had the ball without offering ourselves for a pass, offering advice or offering a simple ‘man on’ call. Equally we did the same when we didn’t have the ball in organising ourselves and each other.

We’ve heard the calls for a trophy this season and with such a long way to go, that’s possible for any side. We all want one, but we don’t deserve one. Nobody does in October. We need a togetherness to get back and win again next week, we need to show we’re prepared to fight and not just try and play pretty football. I’m fully committed and confident that this is what we’ll come out and do, so I’m hoping everyone else is committed as well and puts the effort in on a Thursday and Sunday to ensure we go on another winning run. This is not a serious situation as even with this loss it’s still been a good start to the season – but if we don’t address problems that we have, it could become serious. We won as a team; we’ve lost as a team. Now let’s win again. See you Thursday.

Sunday 18th October 2009
Leonard Vase Cup, Round 1 Group Stage, Trenham Drive

Banter Central FC 1 - 2 Surrey Valley
Brownie

Team: Wuker; Boma (Jewish, 65), Vidic, Tino, L.Dancer; Ridders, Hughes, Doc (Adkins, 65), Wilkes (Cling, 65); Baird, Brownie

Banter’s first loss of the season saw a lead surrendered and ultimately, a second half lesson. The good start from the off was promised and delivered, but it was unusually the period after the break where the whites struggled.

Surrey Valley’s record going into the game read: played 3, won 3, scored 17, conceded 0. It meant at least one team would be giving up their 100% record and on the day it was the home side that had to do so.

Tino captained the side and an energetic start saw Banter get in behind Valley’s defence on a couple of occasions without troubling the goalkeeper. Hughes pulled the strings as he regularly set Baird and Ridders free into wide positions, whilst Boma supported from full-back fantastically well in the early goings. Brownie had plenty of energy and created a decent opening for Baird when he picked the ball up down the right side and went for a run, beating two men before cutting back to his strike partner, who tried the cheeky flick which was blocked and cleared. Brownie continued to cause problems and it was too much for Surrey around the 20 minute mark. Ridders cut out a throw in and sent the ball down the line, Brown chased and brought the ball down with one touch that wiped out two defenders as he carried the ball through into the penalty area – his first shot was saved but he followed up on his left foot to give Banter a well deserved 1-0 lead.

Banter seem to get more and more free kicks from the edge of the penalty area than ever before. David Beckham’s successor has not yet been found however, despite what many believe of themselves (I think we need to work on something a bit smarter than a smash at goal!), this week saw Brown and Hughes having efforts that disappointed the fans.

Banter’s chance to go 2-0 up was as good as any the whites would get; Wilkes made a run down the left and floated in a fantastic cross which Baird leapt at and headed with precision, beating the goalkeeper but bouncing agonisingly back off the post. How games can change with such chances being a few inches to the right.

A few naughty challenges started to fly in – Boma, Vidic, Doc and Legend Dancer all guilty, despite them being mistimed rather than malicious – but the game refused to boil over into anything other than a well contested battle. One tackle which was timed to perfection and most importantly, was Wuker’s outside his area. A long ball forward was chased down by Surrey Valley’s top goalscorer, but Wuker was alert and ready as he got his body behind it, tackling his opponent with supreme accuracy to avert the danger and pass the ball on.

Baird had another chance to double Banter’s lead, Tino’s long free kick from wide left was sent over the top, which saw the 20 year old ghost in at the back post brilliantly, but failed to connect as the ball went out for a goal kick. His frustration showed, the swing at the air afterwards is probably what he should’ve gone for in the first place! Banter took a 1-0 lead into the break.

Surrey Valley really stepped their game up from the first whistle in the second half, whilst Banter struggled to create chances and didn’t release the ball quickly enough at all. That extra touch from everyone in white seemed to squander possession too cheaply on a few occasions.

The away side looked to have their best chance when a long ball sent the big number 9 through on goal, but Tino’s recovery was first class, muscling in from the side before sliding to push the ball away to safety. The away side continued to threaten, but Wuker was positioned well to pluck the ball out of the air on more than one occasion. Valley appeared to find their equaliser, too, when a corner was thumped in and appropriately described as: “the best shit corner, ever” as it was hit low but somehow went across the face of goal to the back post, where it was met and seemed destined to go in, only for Legend Dancer to clear off the line.

Banter had a penalty shout turned down – though probably for good reason – as Brownie was edged off the ball by a defender and sent tumbling in the box. As many protested, the ball was sent downfield, with a Surrey forward dashing through on goal, Wuker came out of his area and tumbling down feet first, missing ball and man as it was taken round him, but with just the net to find from 15 yards, it was shanked and sent horribly wide.

The equaliser appeared imminent – a run down the left and cross into the box was headed at Banter’s goal with power, but Wuker somehow got a hand up and managed to tip it over, executing a fantastic reaction save.

Banter made three substitutions, which should’ve shaken up the side but it didn’t. Arguably, it backfired. Jewish, Cling and Adkins replaced Boma, Wilkes and Doc in straight swaps with 25 minutes remaining. Baird’s run down the left wing caused problems, he beat his marker before fizzing in a dangerous cross, which was cut out by a defender well and sent out for a corner.

Surrey finally equalised though and it was well deserved. A long ball over the top saw the centre-forward race through and lob the ball over Wuker on the bounce and into the net. Banter desperately pressed and were reduced to long range efforts before surrendering possession minutes later and falling to a second goal. Adkins’ ball wide was cut off as Valley’s top scorer was put through down the left, he cut in and arrowed a shot into the far corner. It was a finish fit to win any game of football, though Banter could rightly be disappointed at the way in which it all happened.

Though trying to remain patient, it was speculative efforts that initially seemed to be only way that Banter could level the scores and in some cases it wasn’t particularly pretty. Jewish’s long throw saw Cling nick the ball over his marker’s head, play a one-two with Baird before beating his man in the box to send in a cross for Brownie which was cut out. The resulting corner was sent in again, this time Hughes headed the ball onto the top of the crossbar. It just wasn’t Banter’s day.

The next best chances were with minutes remaining, a Tino freekick was pumped into the box for Baird to meet with his head on the stretch and send over. A similar opportunity saw Adkins play a freekick in behind the defence, Hughes powered forward but his header was sent wide with only the slightest of touches.

Banter were forced to accept defeat at the group stage of the Leonard Vase Cup, a 2-1 loss which perhaps lacked a little composure at times, along with some extra quality in the final third. Plenty of positives though, Surrey Valley hadn’t let a goal in before this game, let alone been given a game to think about – looking at their results. I think we can also agree that whilst it was perhaps an off day, we still gave it a real good go against a very well drilled and organised side. We’ll bounce back, I insist we do!

Man of the match: Chris Mann-ja Vidic. A solid display throughout. It was pretty solid from all of the back five to be honest, not a lot that could’ve been done about either goal and kept both opposing forward quiet for long spells. Even had a go up front, too. If anyone didn’t like this tactic – it was Doc’s idea.

The four game appraisal…

Wuker – Fantastic game and the best so far this season. Came and collected the ball with conviction, distributed it well and did fantastically to even get a hand on that header, let alone get the thing up and over the crossbar. Very comfortable throughout and not a chance for either goal.

Boma – Worked very hard and got forward to support – particularly first half – very well. A second solid display on the bounce, an extremely important challenge against Madras was the highlight last week, having got involved as a sub against Kurdish. Hopefully the back injury has disappeared as it’s always good to have you in the back four – be it out wide or centrally.

Vidic – Had a case for man of the match in probably three from four so far. That we’ve scored lots of goals will make it easier for people to choose attackers, but a superb start to the season with some assured and confident displays. Keep it up.

Tino – ‘Same as it ever was’, as Talking Heads might say. The same things are always said about today’s captain, but only because they’re important and done well. Vocal, powerful and never afraid to take the lead on any header or challenge coming through. Despite a couple of goals shipped today, that central partnership is looking very tight indeed.

L.Dancer – Having played well against Woodmansterne, injury and attendance stuttered the next couple of games, but today’s display was faultless. Fantastic determination at training in the week was carried over into the game and it was hugely evident. Good distribution throughout and put in a couple of “reducers” as Big Ron might say. He even played the ball once or twice. The obligatory apology just as he’s taking down some poor victim though, is of course that – obligatory. It always will be, every week!

Ridders – Another who’s had a case for man of the match every game he’s played. Today’s display was particularly lively in the first half but more quiet in the second, probably down to the team not utilising him out wide enough. He’s nipped in with a couple of equalisers already this season, as well as involvement in plenty of the goals we’ve scored. Adkins doesn’t call him The Talented Mr Ridley for no reason, that right peg is a weapon of mass destruction.

Hughes – He’d probably prefer me to just link a Showboat video of him on YouTube here than make comment, but his dominance in central midfield has been key to our play so far this term. He never seems to run out of steam and brings others into play effortlessly, making time and space under pressure look like a stroll in the park. The Hollywood passes crept into today’s game, but he was still one of our best performers, just as he was against Woodmansterne and in his man of the match performance against Madras.

Doc – Covered right-back, along with central-defence and midfield. Perhaps not his finest display today, it’s still been a terrific start overall to the season for him. He likes to tell others to relax on the ball more and it’s precisely what he’s good at himself, demonstrated perfectly when moved wide against Woodmansterne, along with his sub appearance against Real Madras in midfield. The training attendance could be better, though I’m told that’s set to improve having done well last Thursday. His system for man of the match votes is possibly the dumbest thing I’ve heard since Wuker changed the t-shirt in his hand against Kurdish.

Wilkes – I’d love to be able to explain why he hasn’t completed a game yet. Truth is, there isn’t a particularly valid explanation other than the squad must keep rotating if everyone continues to put the effort in. Which seems harsh given how much effort Wilkes does put in and though subbed off a few times, it’s not been due to a lack of quality either. In two from three cases it has been entirely about freshening things up in an area where we had replacements, because his Banter start has still been genuinely excellent. Four assists and never shy on work rate either, he’s offered us something extra across the whole midfield, being comfortable left, right or centrally. He wants to be a fan favourite too and judging by the comments I’ve heard flying around, mate…… You’ve got no fucking chance.

Baird – Once an Icon, always a diver. But still an Icon, too. I don’t recall him ever being our linesman, but given how well he’s ever done in every other position, I reckon he’d adjust to that very nicely too. Not that I’m saying you can now be our linesman, by the way. A constant threat going forward and besides his determination and complete lack of fear, his two biggest attributes are probably his pace and his aerial ability. The latter could’ve brought him his second goal of the season today, but the former gives defences nightmares throughout. His willingness to gamble is also the reason he has a goal to his name this season, against Woodmansterne.

Brownie – Though we lost, he is now our top scorer. So, every cloud and that… You’re still thinking about the bad news, aren’t you? Five goals in one game broke a club record, people may also forget his display against Madras too where he probably deserved a goal, but he took his effort today wonderfully well. Pace, power, fantastic touch, persevering to the end. I’d like to see him dart into the box for a few more crosses that are swung in, but besides that he is getting it right every time at the moment, more to come as well I expect.

Jewish – A difficult start saw him left out of the first game of the season, but did well as the sweeper keeper against Kurdish the following game, making some lovely saves in the second half too. We’ll not mention Kurdish’s first goal. Oops, I just did, sorry. Came on and filled in well at right-back today, he’s been dedicated at training for a good few weeks now so keep that up as it’s always a bonus to have that versatility.

Adkins – He’s rolled back the years so far this season. Now that’s going to sound stupid for a 24 year-old but he has in fairness had a difficult couple of seasons, not through any fault of his own. Well, maybe one KFC too many, I suppose. But his display against Woodmansterne is as good as any I can remember from him, he played with a bundle of energy going box to box and was thoroughly deserving of his goal. Controlled things in the bizarre Kurdish game, he was then fantastic against Madras in midfield and as a second striker. A yard more pace and sharpness – which he can regain from hard work during games and training – and he’s nailed it. Everything. Even life.

Wommy – We’re all going to insist he wasn’t missed today, but any team will miss his five goals scored so far this season. Showed some real hustle during the first game of the season and was key to Banter’s third goal in setting Ridders free, but it was against Kurdish where it just didn’t seem like it was going to happen for him. He got his first of the season there and it kick started things as he bagged four the following game in a predatory performance. Working is for losers, I kept telling Euro that and look where it’s got him. He ended up in Guernsey, ffs.

Cling – What a guy.

Portland away next week, ladies. We always said we need to bounce back with a win when we lose and the reaction to today’s loss is so important. It’s actually positive that people have come away saying it was “shit” because it wasn’t. It just wasn’t as it good as it could be and those comments show that we know this. We’ve also never beaten Portland, by the way…